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If you want to get better at something, itās going to be uncomfortable.
Why?
Because growth and comfort canāt co-exist.
When you think of something you feel comfortable with, what are you really saying?
Youāre saying that youāre content with it. That your present skills or state is something that feels safe and secure.
But what if you want to get better at something?
That means that thereās a pain point there - a disconnect between where youāre at now and where you want to be.
And to bridge that gap...
Youāve got to accept the discomfort thatāll come with it.
But thatās exactly where most people get tripped up.
Because growth is uncomfortable, we tend to avoid the things that could help us.
I can think of tons of example like this in my personal lifeā¦
- š§ If I was listening to music that intimidated me, Iād shut it off
- šļø Iād cancel meet-ups last minute because I didnāt want to feel awkward socializing
- ā¤ļø I hated the feeling of a racing heart, so I avoided cardio
- But where does this comfort-seeking default lead us?
Yup - nowhere.
(Or at least nowhere new.)
So to grow, weāve got to actively seek out that discomfort.
But what is the discomfort weāre feeling, exactly?
In part, it's exposed weakness.
Recognizing how inexperienced we are at something leads to some pretty painful emotions.
(No one likes feeling incompetent or helpless.)
So we often try to hide our blind spots - not just from others, but from ourselves.
A good example for me is exercise - Iām sharing that more publicly because itās always been a personal weakness.
But thereās a way to approach your inexperience with excitement and curiosity.
Check out content creator JasmineStarās take:
āWorking out will make you feel weak, but itās actually making you stronger.
Learning new things will make you feel dumb, when itās actually making you smarter.
Investing in yourself will make you feel poor, but itās actually making you rich.
Staying consistent will make you feel stagnant, when itās actually helping you grow.ā
See the catch?
Relying on our feelings as a metric for our success wonāt work.
Instead, weāve got trust that weāll get better in time.
Embracing a ābeginnerās mindā means opening ourselves up to learning new things - without judgment or shame.
That saidā¦
You donāt have to push all the way out of your comfort zone to see growth.
(In fact, pushing too far might actually be counterproductive.)
Which begs the question:
What's the "sweet spot" between growth and discomfort?
My therapist Jason from Dr. Kās HealthyGamerCoach program showed me this chart:
(Check out the adjectives for each zone - comfort, growth, and stress - and determine where youāre at right now for a particular focus in your life.)
Feeling lifeless, stable, or low-risk? šŖ
Youāre probably in your comfort zone.
Not a bad place to be, but it might be worth pushing into the growth zone.
Feeling stressed, fed-up, or exhausted? š°
Youāre probably in your stress zone.
And that means before you try to grow, youāve got to get back to your baseline of comfort.
Explore how you can make things feel more stable and secure before pushing yourself to grow.
Either wayā¦
This is an excellent exercise to figure out where youāre at now, and what needs to change for you to find a healthy balance between growth and discomfort.
š Ready for more?
When you're ready, here's 4 ways I can help:
- š„ My YouTube. Watch 350+ videos including music tutorials, career tips, and more.
- šļø The Newsletter Archive. Read articles from previous weeks of this newsletter.
- š¬ Composing Career Bootcamp. Join my 6-week cohort-based course to learn how to land paid composing work from anywhere in the world. (100+ students, 5 stars)
- š Work Directly with Me. I'm offering private mentorship to a handful of select media composers. If you're interested, click the link to apply.
That's all for now!
Hit reply to share your thoughts, questions, or just to say hi.
(I love hearing from my readers. š)
Otherwise, happy music-making and I'll see you next Tuesday!
- Zach
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